God’s Design For Marriage
Key Verse
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
– Genesis 2:24
Basic Biblical Understanding
Marriage is one of the greatest and most challenging relationships in life. To embrace the beauty and address the challenges, we need to return to the design. As a part of His creative work in Genesis 1-2, God also created or designed marriage.
The King James Version of Genesis 2:24 provides a memorable way to remember this design. “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” God’s design for marriage is expressed in three concepts:
Leave father and mother,
Cleave to your spouse,
Weave together as one for life.
The “leave” part of the design establishes new parameters for human relationships. When married, your spouse is to become the most important human relationship in your life. That does not mean you cut other relationships out of your life. It means your spouse is your priority. Your spouse gets your best. Your spouse should not have to fight for your attention.
The “cleave” part of God’s design shows His intentions for the relationship. We are to cleave to our spouse. The word “cleave” means “to unite with or be joined to.” Marriage should not look like roommates with a joint checking account. We are to join with our spouse. Our lives are to be united together.
The “weave” part of God’s design describes the depth of uniting together. God tells us that “they shall be one flesh.” Two are to become one for life. That doesn’t mean the husband or wife lose individual personalities or identity; it means the couple learns to think as one, plan as one, live as one, act as one, and unite as one.
Leave, cleave, and weave. The design is simple but the application must be prayerfully worked out over time.
Verses (ask God to to show you how they apply to your life)
“A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.”
– 1 Corinthians 7:39
“‘And the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.’ And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. And he said to them, ‘Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.’”
– Mark 10:8-12
Helpful Questions and Application
In what ways have you diverted from God’s design for marriage? What steps can you take today to move back to God’s design?
Do you know a mature Christian couple who has built a marriage around God’s design? If so, reach out to them and ask if they would be willing to share some insights God has shared with them.
What resources are you reading to gain godly wisdom for your marriage?
Additional Resources
Scripture references: 2 Corinthians 6:14; Ephesians 5:25-33; Hebrews 13:4
WordTruth Article:
“Loving an ‘Unlovable’ Mate”
“Words—The Thermometer of Your Heart”
“U R My Luv”